“Success is getting what you want. Happiness is wanting what you get.” – Dale Carnegie
You are the master of your life. However, a lot of us find it much easier to give up that power and defer to our situation or messaging we have absorbed from our family and society. This means that we give away our power and allow the people around us to dictate our path.
Do you ever find yourself saying “I’m not … because …”? This is one way that you hand over your power. In this data gathering exercise, you will watch your thoughts and words and use the insight this brings to reclaim your power over your life.
1) Over the course of the next week you will be on the lookout for any time you find yourself saying or thinking “I can’t …” On each occasion, make a note of the complete phrase. You might find it easier to keep your record up to date if you check in with yourself every few hours. Some examples might be: I can’t cook. I cannot fit that into my schedule. I can’t get fit. I can’t afford to make that purchase. I can’t learn how to …
2) When you have generated your list identify common themes or domains where you are most likely to say I can’t. Perhaps it comes up around developing a new skill, or being stressed, or taking time for you. Which sticking points have you identified.
3) Which of the items you generated are things that you actually really want to do? They do not have to be out of reach. Change each of these statements to one that empowers you. I can …, I am … use these statements as your new mantra. Schedule something that makes each of these statements true.
This exercise benefits you by revealing how you hold yourself back. By changing your perspective and willingness to engage you can make progress in avenues that are of interest to you that you were telling yourself were out of reach.