Coaching Modalities

The Mexican Fisherman

by Elizabeth Saigal

A little story about a Mexican fisherman illustrates success. However, success means completely different things to different people as you will see …

The businessman was at the pier of a small coastal Mexican village when a small boat with just one fisherman docked. Inside the small boat were several large yellowfin tuna. The businessman complimented the Mexican on the quality of his fish and asked how long it took to catch them. The Mexican replied only a little while.

The businessman then asked why he didn’t stay out longer and catch more fish? The Mexican said he had enough to support his family’s immediate needs. The businessman then asked, but what do you do with the rest of your time? The Mexican fisherman said, “I sleep late, fish a little, play with my children, take a siesta with my wife, Maria, stroll into the village each evening where I sip wine and play guitar with my amigos; I have a full and busy life, señor.”

by Elizabeth Saigal

This account is based on real events. It provides a great analogy as to how our essence is hidden to protect ourselves. Our conditioning results from things that frighten us. These mindsets often remain even after the threat has passed

During the Burmese Siamese war in 1767, the Burmese army invades Thailand. They are very brutal; ravaging the land, burning, looting, and killing as they make their way to the capital.

In the course of their conquest, they come to a temple. They attack and kill all the monks and loot the treasure. They leave what seems worthless behind. One of the things they leave behind is a large clay statue of the Buddha.

After the war, conquering Thai King Rama I commissions the construction of many temples in the new capital city Bangkok. In 1801, he orders that various old Buddha images should be transported to these new temples from the ruined temples around the country. And so, the clay statue of the Buddha makes its journey by boat on the river to Bangkok. As it happens, the Buddha statue is too large to house inside the temple so they station it under a simple roof outside.

by Elizabeth Saigal

The following is a well know Taoist story that makes us this about whether the outcome of an event is as good or bad as we think it is.

***

There once was a sage, old farmer who had worked his crops for many years with his beloved stallion.

One day, the farmer enters his stallion into a local competition and wins first prize. His neighbors all congratulate him on his good fortune. “Fantastic,” they say. “Maybe” the farmer replies.

Soon after, having seen the quality of the stallion in the show, thieves steal the horse. Upon hearing the news, his neighbors come to visit. “Such bad luck,” they comment sympathetically. “Maybe,” the farmer replies.

by Elizabeth Saigal

The precursors and outcomes of a fixed or growth mindset are outlined by Carol Dweck in her book “Mindset: The New Psychology of Success – How we can learn to fulfill our potential.”

The fixed mindset is essentially a belief that ability is predetermined such that you either have a natural talent or you don’t. In other words, your capabilities cannot be changed. A fixed mindset is thought to arise from an overemphasis on outcomes and doing well.

The growth mindset is a belief that abilities can be acquired or refined. In other words, your capabilities can be changed. A growth mindset results from receiving praise for effort, involvement, and improvement.

by Elizabeth Saigal

One way to maintain a positive mindset is to always look for the gift in everything that happens. This is sometimes challenging in something that seems objectively bad. However, there is always a benefit, and applying this uplifting perspective increases resilience and counteracts any tendency to dwell on misfortune.

The Three Gifts Technique is a concept introduced by Shirzad Chamine in his book on Positive Intelligence. It is designed to support shifting to and strengthening the sage perspective and the sage powers of empathize, explore, innovate, navigate, and activate.

If you are having difficulty in finding any upside to a particular situation you can begin by thinking of at least three ways a problem could be turned into a gift or opportunity at some point in the future.

Having to overcome a challenge or correct a mistake strengthens our ability to handle these obstacles. This provides a smoother ride the next time we encounter something similar. Looking for the gifts allows us to minimize the time and energy lost in ruminating about the things that have befallen and be at choice in being proactive.

The Three Gifts Technique empowers us on three different levels. These are Knowledge, Power, and Inspiration.

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Coaching Modalities

The Mexican Fisherman

Golden Buddha

Maybe

Do you have a Growth Mindset?

The Three Gifts Technique